Life is full of crossroads.
Some of us look for pros and cons before making a decision and some of us just go with our gut. What holds true to all of us is that often these choices have us facing things in life we hadn't expected. While, at the time, we might be struggling or feeling as if we can't push on, we are learning a lesson desperately needed to put us on the necessary path.
I'm a firm believer in everything happening for a reason. I believe the universe puts us on certain paths to learn certain things as a means to understand our existence and share our knowledge with others. We are here to learn and grow and make those who come after us wiser by sharing the knowledge of the universe.
As a writer, I often pour my emotions into my work as well as life experiences, to a degree. I haven't experienced everything my characters have, mostly because I don't live in an actual fantasy world (how I wish!), but I can empathize with how they may react in certain situations.
So why the post? I'm coming to a crossroads, myself. How do I choose which way to go? Do I need to abandon something I love for something necessary? Is there a way to keep everything in my life? Is this one of those times that the lesson means more than the thing I'm giving up?
How do I choose when it's all important to me in one way or another? Deep down, I think I know what my decision needs to be, but I still want to be sure that I'm making the right choice. I've come to the apex of things and will need to make a choice soon, but I don't quite know what I should choose.
How do you make important choices? What do you weigh when deciding things?
So what I'm about to talk about has nothing to do with the book world, although I know that similar issues arise in all areas of life. One of the biggest issues plaguing my day-to-day lately has been drama. I. HATE. DRAMA. There are people that I've stopped speaking to in the last several years because they carry drama with them everywhere, like a blanket of hate that they just drape all over everything and everyone around them. It's exhausting, unnecessary and completely childish.
I like to think that I can conduct myself fairly well as an adult and handle my relationships as such. I don't like confrontation, but I'm not afraid of it either. If I have a problem with someone, I try to talk it out because you never know when there's just a misunderstanding. However, I'm also one of the rare breed of people who can separate their work life and personal life. This means that if I have a disagreement with someone on a working matter, it likely will not carry over outside of work because I don't tend to bring work home with me if I can help it. I'm realizing that this is a rarity.
One of my faults is honesty. I say this is a fault because people DO NOT like honesty. It often hurts or makes them uncomfortable. I just prefer not beating around the bush because, well, what's the point? We're all adults, right? Shouldn't we be able to handle criticism by now? Shouldn't we be able to differentiate between constructive and destructive criticism? Am I just living in La-La Land? Is there some unspoken rule that I don't know about which dictates that this thinking is wrong?
Each day, I have to remind myself that there are people who can't, don't or won't see things this way. These people aren't wrong, but different and that's okay. I guess what boggles my mind is the reluctance to adapt to change and overcome challenges that exist in the real world. I don't understand how these things are feared. I don't understand how people are so frightened of something as silly as switching from writing something on paper to typing it in an email because heaven forbid it's not the same as it used to was (improper grammar intended). It just doesn't make any sense.
In closing, CHANGE IS GOOD! Change makes the world go 'round. Without change, we wouldn't be where we are technologically or socially, for that matter (although one might argue not ALL of the social change has been good). If nothing ever changed, nothing would ever get done. It's just that plain and simple. With that being said, the number one thing that requires change is often ourselves. Whether we realize it or not, we must continue to evolve as individuals in order to survive and that's just the way it is. If I didn't evolve, I wouldn't be able to form intelligent and legible sentences or thoughts. If I didn't evolve, I wouldn't be able to properly mother my children or wife-like to my husband. Most of all, if I haven't evolved, I wouldn't see these problems existing around me on a daily basis. Unfortunately, we can't force anyone to see these things or to do anything to change them. All we can do is look inside and use what we know to keep moving forward in spite of the stunted environments around us.
It ain't pretty, but it's life.
What are your thoughts?
Obviously, I have a problem. After being socially active for some time, I fall off the face of the earth and bury myself in projects and other things, including my normal day-to-day life, as an avoidance tactic. In this business, being present means building your brand (your name) and a fanbase. It also equates to book sales and reviews, etc. It's A LOT to manage on your own, especially if you have other things going on in your life which require your attention.
Aside from being an author, I'm a mother and a wife. I also have a full time job as an IT Support Tech and I own a small business on the side. My life is never 100% slow. With the kids come the extracurriculars such as sports, band, etc, in which I am their primary mode of transportation and support. My husband's job is physically demanding so during the week, I shoulder much of the basic needs and he fills in the rest on the weekends. We also have a pug named Frankie (who you'll see if you follow me on Instagram) and she gets ALL the attention because, well, she's the baby!
On any given day, between all of my social media accounts, I'm burning up the WiFi or data to connect to people. Finding that balance is ROUGH. I need to be here to spend time with my family, but I need to also be HERE to spend time with my online family. When does it become too much? My husband and I have squabbled about this in the past and at some point I have to decide when I've crossed the boundary and left my family behind. So you can see my dilemma?
I may post on Twitter or Instagram and sometimes even Facebook, but my blog and journal will go lacking, especially when I don't have a terrible amount of things to say. I mean, do you want to hear about my day at the office? Do you need to know that my son has strep throat? Does my struggle with life make for tantalizing news? If you wouldn't recognize my name next to any others, chances are none of the above matters to you, so what the hell am I to write about?
Blogging is a challenge because, well, I'm just not that interesting! I don't peruse the internet looking for articles. I don't care enough about trolling other writer's Goodreads or Amazon looking for some type of drama to report on. I'm just not that type of person and I won't sink to that level just for "clicks". If people don't want to be here because of some cheesy headline that has nothing to do with me or my work. I want you all to be here BECAUSE of me or my work. It's why I do what I do.
So please don't think I don't care or that I'm not trying to put out more of a variety of work for you all to read. I have simply been in a funk and can't seem to stick to one project long enough to finish anything. I've tried, and every time I get pulled away toward something else. It sucks, but that's just the way things are right now.
If you want to keep up with me, PLEASE connect on all of my social media!! You will see my quirky, nerdy and definitely dweeby self and will see that I truly do embrace this passion, I just have a hard time expressing it sometimes! Promise me you'll follow?? I'll hold you to it!!!
See you on the other side!!
P.S - For some reason, I'm unable to link my accounts, so I've included them below!!
It's been some time since I've written, mostly because year end has me running around like a mad person. Of course, being sick for nearly two months straight didn't do me any favors. So, where do I stand? Well, technically I guess I'm sitting, but that leaves me to plan out my next year so I can, hopefully, bring more stories to life.
With that being said, Legacy of Secrets will come to an end this year. It's been a long seven years and many tears, but it is time to bid farewell. I can't begin to tell you how bittersweet I feel about the whole thing. I mean, it was the first series, the first actual books, I've ever written, and somehow people have enjoyed them. However, my story doesn't end there. I have COUNTLESS stories nagging at the back of my brain, begging to be given the chance to spill onto those pages. I've held them back for a long time, trying to get LoS just right, but that time is about to be here and I'm so, so glad.
Perhaps the first story to be finished will be Falling Undercover, as it is halfway there, but I'm not sure it it's the right time for that one yet. No, I think I have one or two others that might be better suited. First, there's a new series I just cooked up a few weeks ago that's heavily rooted in Greek mythology. Second, the Sci-fi novel that I've kept pretty close to the vest for the last five years or so. That one will be a wondrous book to behold, if I get the courage up enough to write it.
Seems silly, doesn't it? I guess I'm afraid it will not be as good written down as it is in my head. I have this disease where stories play out like movies and then I am supposed to, somehow, figure out how to translate them to other people. It's called being a writer, and sometimes it sucks!
But I digress...here's to a prosperous 2016! We all need it anyway. I mean, we've been working our asses off for twelve months with little to show. It's time there was a year to bring down the shower of dolla dolla bills y'all!! Hahahaha!
What's your 2016 have in store?
One month. That's all that's left of 2015. I keep looking back on this year, trying to figure out whether I've actually accomplished anything. I feel like I've been running in place, grasping at straws and making an all out ass of myself. I can't be alone in this, right?
It seems I like to just fly by the seat of my pants most days and that doesn't work for me. I know it doesn't work, but I've done little to fix it. NO MORE. I am putting some new things into place in December that will help to keep me engaged with my "fans" and connections, free up my computer time to do things that are actually productive and give me some much needed time to spend with my family.
One of the most frustrating parts of this business is the saturation of the market. There are SO MANY authors out there who've published in some capacity. A good portion of them are great, but there are those who need more practice that are ruining it for the rest of us. I hate to sound like I'm full of myself (which if you've read any of my work at all, you know that's not me), but I like to think my talent is at least above the average author. When I see other authors see success when their skill level is lacking, to put it nicely, I get extremely discouraged. Not to say that their stories aren't wonderful, but the delivery leaves something to be desired in some cases.
But I digress. My personal feelings about the publishing world is pretty much irrelevant. Every author dreams of something bigger and I'm no different. Unfortunately, I just don't have those types of connections to make it happen, which is why I have been struggling as of late. I'm sure you've seen me say "Procrastination is my superpower" at some point and I am definitely not lying about that. Sometimes, it gets so bad that I'm up until 6 am just trying to finish a scene or task. It can get pretty ridiculous. This is also why I'm working on correcting my terrible behavior!
That being said, I hope to have another book coming out around the first of the year that is completely different from everything else. You might have seen Falling Undercover listed on my social media or even seen the page on my website. It is a romantic suspense novel that I hope won't completely suck :p.
Well, I'm off to write for about an hour before I have to sleep to go back to my real life job (highly overrated, I know). Happy reading, loves!
I'm a writer, a mother, a wife, a friend, a sister, and a daughter. My journey as a published author is in full swing and I'm inviting all my friends along for the ride!