There are memes like this all across the internet about how strange writers are, finding yourself written into and later killed in a writer's story, characters talking in the writer's mind, etc. The sad part is that it's all true! Even when I don't write daily, my mind is still running a mile a minute, thinking about plot ideas, story arcs, progression, dialog, settings, playlists and just about everything else that I'm NOT supposed to think about! The struggle is very real.
Which brings me to why I still haven't finished my current project. I've been preoccupied, mostly because I have a very busy daily life. I'm a wife and mother, as well as having a full-time job and part time business on the side. I need more of me! Ultimately, I just have to put everything else aside, turn off the TV, crank up Pandora and let it flow. Trust me, it's harder than it seems.
So, I'll leave you all with this: my goal to finish Falling Undercover is 4/19. I don't know when it will be published, mainly because it may be optioned by my publisher, but the manuscript shall be done! I'm marking it on my calendar now and leaving you to actually do some work.
Alright...I'm going now...I promise...
Lately, I find myself drawn to stories (both in print and TV) with passionate love stories. Why? It may be because I enjoy a good love story, but I think there's more behind that. Some say, you only have one GREAT LOVE in a lifetime. Is that true? I'm not really sure, but what I do know is that passion, in my opinion, is the root of all great things such as love and art.
Without passion, how do you know what moves you? And if you don't know what moves you, how could you love or create? Actually, that answer isn't hard. If you lack passion, you are simply motivated by other means. While there's nothing wrong with that, I can only imagine the unsatisfactory lifestyle of those who are passionless.
I like to think that my life doesn't lack passion, but I'm drawn to it like a moth to a flame. Why? That's what I keep asking myself. Why am I so engrossed in the passionate stories of lovers, life and art? Sometimes it's best to be starved because your creativity has the freedom of your desires to roam - sometimes creating something better than you'd hoped. I've often found myself choosing to keep myself locked away while writing a novel so as not to have the creative process interrupted by the very desires I am writing. It's hard to, sometimes even causing me grief, but while I suffer as a person, my work usually thrives.
Now, however, I find these moments fleeting. It's almost like I've forgotten how to build passion or at the very least exploit it. I have characters needing to be written and stories needing to be spun and I am hung up on the one thing we all crave. PASSION is a rare thing, but it's also the most coveted and what keeps us coming back for more, no matter how toxic the consequences.
What is passion to you? What do you make of my...short comings? How would you add passion to your life? To your story?
It never fails. I sit down on my recliner, laptop in hand, alcoholic beverage of choice on the end table and Pandora playing on shuffle in the background completely prepared to write what my characters have been screaming in my head all day, but something happens before I give them the chance to tell their story. MY thoughts interfere with theirs- and win. So instead of writing, I end up looking at Pinterest, updating my website, shopping on Amazon and pretty much everything OTHER THAN writing this damn book!
I need to shut it all off, buckle down and get it out of my head and into your (the reader's) hands. What's stopping me? I know the quality of some of the work I've done recently, and I honestly don't know if I can top it or at the very least, match it. That may sound like I'm being conceited, but it's nothing like that. I don't even look at myself as a great writer. Good- maybe. Great- not a chance. Why? Well, I'm no J.K. Rowling or Stephen King. I have great ideas, but A LOT to learn. However, I am eternally grateful for the fans I've amassed with my current works. I can only hope as I embrace the gift of Raven't Seduction Press' publishing offer, that number will grow and my words will be heard. Be it good or bad experience, every reader is a welcomed one.
That being said, I'm going to shut the hell up now and get to writing. That's what I planned doing nearly two hours ago, yet here I am, writing in this damn journal. See? I've done it again!
Until next time!
I'm a writer, a mother, a wife, a friend, a sister, and a daughter. My journey as a published author is in full swing and I'm inviting all my friends along for the ride!