I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one who lives through the "when it rains, it pours" mentality, but damn it's been a hurricane lately. It's hard to keep your head when everything seems to be falling apart, but then again, that's kind of the point of life, right? I mean, we're built to survive, even when we're at the worst points in life. At least that's what I choose to believe.
As a writer, I live vicariously through my characters. The loves, losses, adventures and everything in between fills the parts of me that craves these things. So what if it's all in my head? I can say that at least I've lived it in a sense. Reading is the only thing you can do that provides endless lives to live and relive. You can be in Narnia one day and the next in Forks, WA. Writers get to create those worlds and then relive them again and again. It's no wonder some of us go insane.
Until next time....
It's constant; like a current. Words, phrases, ideas, thoughts, plots, names, things, things....so many damn things. Sometimes it's exhausting and debilitating. Sometimes I feel like I need a dial to turn it down. Sometimes I have no idea what's going on. What I do know is that I'd probably be clinically insane if anyone took the time to notice.
So what's the cure? You tell me! I watch a lot of Netflix (usually stuff pertaining to what I'm writing), read a lot of books (same genres as shows) and jot down notes whenever possible. The last thing I want to do is forget something that might be important. Of course to someone like me, even the description of a person's voice could be tantamount to an entire 80k word novel. It's the little things, right?
Call me crazy. Call me brilliant (which is a stretch). Call me a creative soul. But not one person can call me lazy.
What do you do to turn down the white noise?
I'm not sure if any authors are like me, but after pouring my brain into a story, I need to recharge. I envy those who can just pick up story after story without needing a break or time in between. I envy them, but I'm also glad I'm not one of them. Having this time gives me the opportunity to read novels I may have put off because of working on my book, which there are many burning a hole through my Nook and Kindle (yes I have both). Sometimes it also gives me the time to plot and plan my next book because they don't always flow from the start. Lastly, but most importantly, I have to make time to spend with my family or on other business ventures I partake in (I'm a workaholic).
I will never NOT be a writer (I know, terrible grammar there). Since I was seven, I've been writing in some form or fashion and I know this is what my passion truly is. Maybe I'm wired differently or maybe I'm only destined to write books that can only be counted on two hands. Either way, I crave the interim almost as much as the month long writing binges. We all need an obsession just the same as we need the distractions.
As I finish one project, I find myself longing to write more and more until I just can't write any longer. Then I remember that I have a full time job, a part time job, two kids, a husband and a dog and that pretty much stops me short. I envy those who can literally devote everything to writing. I wish my husband made enough money so I could stay home to pursue my dream, but he doesn't. I wish that my part time business was full time and I didn't have a regular job so I could make my own hours, but as my grandmother used to say...want in one hand and shit in the other!
It seems cynical, when really it's just me being realistic. I was not born or married into privilege, so I have to work hard for everything we have. Not to say I don't enjoy being able to have a thriving household, but I'd rather it be doing something I love instead of something I like. I guess the bright side is that I don't actually hate my 8-5 gig.
At the end of the day, all I can do is make the best of my days and times. It can be difficult, but it seems I live to hustle and even when I'm not working - I'm working. My brain is always ten steps ahead no matter what I'm doing, which tends to include sleeping. The only thing left to do is keep pushing forward and hope for better things to come.
I'm a writer, a mother, a wife, a friend, a sister, and a daughter. My journey as a published author is in full swing and I'm inviting all my friends along for the ride!